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06 Mai 爛問答第二回白痴100問
【1】首先打出50個自己喜歡的人 【2】一定要是認識的,不可以是偶像明星 【3】打完之後再點10個人 【4】並回答100個問題,點人的或被點的人都必須要回答唷 喜歡的50個人 十只手指數得晒... ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1.收到這個問答的時間: 2007年5月6日下午5時54分零九秒 2.你的本名: 伊凡西緒 3.最常用的匿稱: evansire , cloudy........................... 4.交往的對象怎麼叫你: 我不知 5.你怎麼叫你交往的對象: 係白痴 6.你現在正在聽什麼歌: GARDENIA 7.看到問答前吃過什麼:牛奶 8.外面天氣如何: hot 9.近視度數: not tell u 10.戴眼鏡嗎: 是呀是呀 11.生日: 不說 12.養過什麼動物: 龜... 13.兄弟姐妹: 沒有 14.眼珠顏色: 白色的
15.髮色: 白色的 16.頭髮長度: 3米(恐怖嗎) 17.膚色: 黃種人中的曬不黑 18.身高/體重: 不知......... 20.有幾個洞: 什么洞??我只知道鼻子有2個 , 耳朵2個 , 嘴巴一個=.= 21.你有刺青嗎: 沒有 22.喜歡的穿著: 是但著 23.有在特殊部位打過洞嗎: 正常的也不會 24.你喜歡你目前的生活嗎: 不 25.你快樂嗎: 希望是 26.出生地: ??? 27.目前居住地: 火星 28.代步工具: 阿拉丁carpet 29.喜歡的車: ban 士 30.酒品如何: 沒有18= = 31.有喝酒的習慣嗎: 沒有18= = 32.抽煙嗎(牌子): 不抽 33.有抽煙的習慣嗎: 二手菸...有 34.出過車禍嗎:沒有 , 我是乘孩子...嗎?? 35.喜歡過幾個人: 100000個吧=.= 36.喜歡過的星座: 處女多= = 37.愛過幾個人: 1000000個 , 每天失戀="= 38.和幾個人交往過: ???? 39.交往過的星座: 處女...
40.分手的理由: 玩厭啊 41.分手後的關係: 不知 42.最久的戀情多久: 未知耶 43.想過結婚嗎(幾歲時要結): 不想結 44.出現過讓你想結婚的對象嗎: 沒 45.會因為害羞而不敢跟人告白嗎: 啊~~今天天氣很好~~~ 46.最喜歡什麼食物: 巧克力~~ 47.挑不挑食: 挑!!! 48.喜歡吃水果: 不愛= = 49.喜歡喝什麼東西: 是氣泡也喝 50.最喜歡的顏色: black , silver! 51.最喜歡的數字: 4 52.最喜歡的電影: 不知............. 53.喜歡看哪一種的電影類型: 史詩 奇幻 54.不能接受哪類影片: 愛情 , 惡搞 55.有沒有固定會看的讀物: 有 56.喜歡的作家: 很多耶 57.崇拜的人: MANA!!!MANA 是我本命!!!!! 58.喜歡的藝人: MANA!!!MANA!!MANA!!! 59.最喜歡的歌: MOI DIX MOIS 的所有歌 60.最喜歡的卡通人物: KERORO 61.最喜歡的品牌: 沒有 62.最懷念的日子: 沒有 63.最喜歡的季節: 不知 64.喜歡的花: ROSE 65.最不喜歡或是最怕遇到的話題: 你阿媽在哪 66.喜歡的運動: 不愛運動 67.討厭的運動: ALL!! 68.比過哪些比賽有得獎: .....................啞了... 69.得獎的反應: 呵呵~今天天氣很好 70.喜歡的冰淇淋種類: 香草、抹茶 , 巧克力 , ETC............. 71.喜歡什麼蛋糕類的東西: CHEESE , 巧克力 , LEMON 72.吃不吃刺激性的食物: 照吃可也 73.最怕什麼東西: 狗 74.最喜歡的電視台: 沒有 75.最討厭做的事: 被人寸 76.喜歡什麼場所: 鬼屋 77.討厭什麼場所: 課室 78.討厭別人做什麼: 當眾打飛機!! 79.擅長的事: 說大話 80.以後想做什麼職業: 不知 81.常上什麼網站: 這裡 , HOHO! 82.無聊的時候你大多做些什麼: 打GAY 佬 83.你住得距離最遠的一個朋友在哪裡: 木星 84.你最想去哪個國家: 地球某一處 85.世界上最惱人的事: 悶 86.全世界最好的事: 見到MANA!! 87.如果有人誤會你: 不明說到明 88.有想過要怎麼對付你討厭的人嗎: 我會報仇~~把人的壞事公告天下 , 哈哈哈 89.通常幾點上床睡覺: 10時01分 90.最常想見的人是誰: JUKA!! 91.現在在想著誰: KAYA 92.有想過要自殺嗎: 有 93.會常常都想太多嗎: 家常便飯 94.最近幸福嗎: 不!!! 95.口頭譂: 哦呵呵呵 96.最喜歡的一句話: ????? 97.手机的型號: 不關心= =
98.今天心情好嗎: 不好 99.回答問題的時間: 用了100個小時耶 100.你要點誰(10人): 要的話自己COPY!! 02 Mai 本月第一個BLOG....爛問答.本命團(請只寫一團...本命就是本命,難不成還有主本命跟副本命嗎?)
Moi dix Mois
2.除了以上還支持那些團體? MM , Kagrra , Evanescence , X-Japan , L'arc En Ciel (太多太多了...是我自己花心 , 呵呵) 3.心目中的主唱 KLAHA!!永遠是KLAHA~~(JUKA 和SETH 會次等....SORRY~~沒辦法 , 始終喜歡KLAHA 多= =~) 4.心目中的GUITAR手 MANA~~(永遠是MANA~~) 5.心目中的BASS手 RUN 6.心目中的鼓手 YOSHIKI (我不認識KAMI= =ll) 7.你確定你剛說的那幾個麵組起來的團可看嗎? 不知道 , 很多亂寫~O~
8.那團名要叫....? <<那個團據說是很久之前已經有了只不過被人遺忘了三萬四千六百九十一年零四個月再加二十日>>
9.目前為止最喜歡的一首歌 為什麼一定一首歌?十首歌不行嗎 Xanadu
10.為什麼? 好聽好聽 , 正到爆~~很有莊嚴的FEELING~~
11.現在那個樂團解散你最心痛? LAREINE解散我最HAPPY(因為我不用再聽KAMIJO 亂嗲)
12.承上,你覺得該樂團解散原因會是什麼? MAYU失蹤ING 13.樂團做什麼事讓你無法接受? 吸毒 , 藏毒 , 販毒 , 賭博 , 嫖妓 , 八掛(這個我看誰才接受吧) , 同性戀(這個我看誰才接受吧) 14.現在最想對哪個麵說什麼話? MANA
你開口說個話 , 幫我串果個姓朱叫做球翼GE 仆街 , 佢成日在我後面整天吱吱喳喳吵個不停 , 我真係好想屌佢呀
15.你覺得身為一個主唱要.... 唔好好似KAMIJO 咁樣就得
16.你覺得身為一個GUITAR手要.... 唔好好似MAYU 咁樣就得
17.你覺得身為一個BASS手要.... 做好自己GE 本份~~
18.你覺得身為一個鼓手要.... 唔好拖累成隊BAND!
19.每聽總是會感動的歌 KLAHA GE 歌~~呵呵
20.當下最想看那個團唱那首歌? MOI DIX MOIS GE 歌.......................
21.無法忍受其他FANS的什麼? COSPLAY!!
22.讓你無法容忍的主唱 KAMIJO..........
佢人又娘娘腔 , 又GAY , 又八 , 又低能....最好同某CHEWEE結婚好了
23.讓你無法容忍的GUITAR手 MAYU!!! 24.讓你無法容忍的BASS手 NO
25.讓你無法容忍的鼓手 NO
26.讓你無法容忍的樂團 LAREINE!!! 27.去LIVE前必做的事 買票..............沒票怎樣入去呢???
28.討厭LIVE裡那些事 放出一種神秘的氣體...................(那裡很迫 , 萬一不小心聞到這種神秘氣體就不好吧)
29.有沒有曾經買到地雷盤的經驗? 沒有
30.承上,聽完的感想如何 不知道
31.聽過最想走人的LIVE 主音最高音的一PART 但又走音(那時我真的想上去打人) 32.你安置哪團(必答) MM!!
33.遇過最令你印像深刻的麵 沒有 , ANYTHING 我KEEP住三分鐘熱度 34.你擁有V系那團最多東西? CD吧................. 35.收集最完整的V系樂團音源? MOI DIX MOIS 36.請說出你覺得那個解散原因最爛 很多很多 某人因為經常搞爛GAG而解散
某仁兄因為愛上團上某一個人而那個人不接受該仁兄的愛意 , 他因此而離隊...........(你想像力太豐富啦)
爭女人...................................................
離婚(見過最離譜的一個= =b)
37.你覺得支持V系樂團要有什麼 錢 愛心 耐心 時間 38.請為這份問卷做個總結 多 , 累 , 仆街! 39.請傳給三~六個人(名字要寫喔~) 你們自己寫吧.............. 24 April 今日...比人FIT到 , 頂~~~咩日子來啊 , 去死吧今日早上Ms.S.L. 叫我第一個小息去找她 ,
去了G.O. 見到校長 , 校長知道我去找Ms.S.L. 就在問我犯了什么事...
天哪,,,犯了事一定要見她嗎...?
結果打第一個鐘才見到她= =
不過她找我是沒有啥米事的 , 只是談...不知啥米事 , 基本上我已經忘光光了
之後果4堂...high high 地
last 2 堂我因為飯氣攻心...睡左 23 April 20日冇updated= =b今日我老表send 左這個mail給我 , 內容全部show 光:
死女包...无大无细...问M记在巴基斯坦开有乜正面影响来做乜啊?你想去开间啊?
因為我之前在QQ問那個問題(因為要做功課) , 結果沒人答 , 之後我FORGET 左佢啦...之後今日..................我收到呢個MAIL , 就以上那個...
接著我在回信寸他:好心你用下你個BRAIN 吧... 05 April 本月第一個BLOG=.= JUKA沒化妝的樣=.=b
他成個人睇落好似老左好多=.=
食d野補一下啦 , 青春有限啊~~~
我覺得佢化妝好過冇化妝
雖然佢化妝好恐怖 , 但起碼有帶個feel 回來啊嘛!
佢唔化妝成個阿伯咁 , 但係冇染髮ge話會真係好好多啊
哎~佢成個人好憔悴啊
(我在這裡跟JUKA 道個歉 , 因為我批評得好狠)
我好耐冇UPDATE過呢個BLOG啦 , 哎.......
雖然我有好多野呻
但係我成日也忘記左BLOG GE 存在
放假啦 , 冇地方比我HEA啦
悶死人呀
今日某N , 某妖和某M話今晚上MSN
不過依家...鬼影冇一只!!
我一個人點傾個project啊???
自言自語啊???
會比人話我傻ga!!!
哎~呢d人冇d合作精神!!!!! 10 März 支持MANA和AMY LEE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Mana X Amy Lee [Gothic Dialogue Japan-America] The emperor of darkness and the queen of "goth kawaii" (?) face to face. "Mana of the highly and grandiose Moi dix Mois, and the princess pf the music "goth kawaii (cute)" Amy Lee of the No. 1 Band of the West on Tour. A talk session of last moment apparition. Both have the essence and share the word of Gothic and metal, and also the artistic vision about the fashion. An interview that took place in a tight engagement. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Q:- To beging with, what was the first impression of each other? Amy Lee:- My clothes are very normal (compares to Mana's)... a shame. If I would have had more time, I would have dressed better. Mana sama:- It did not matter to me. I saw her in a concert of Yokohama, that time I though she looked really powerful*. But today, how I see her, in truth she's cute. AL:- aah! The truth is that when I'm on stage with the look of music, is necessary to give a dramatic impression, no? and well, it's when I'm on stage, and my normal self, are two persons completely different. When I get off stage, I take a deep breath and think "I want to go back to normal!" Mana sama-Same to me when I am doing a show, I try to unite all my strength on stage. Q:- Even though this is Evanecense third time in Japan, was this time any different? Amy Lee:- I was worried because it has been three years since I've been in Japan, but for the contrary, it surprise me the energy with which we were received. Also, they gave us gifts, I learned many things about the japanese culture... though today I have to continue the tour in Australia, this tour for Japan was very fun. Mana sama:- For Moi dix Mois, the tour outside of the country are concentrated in Europe, and even though I went to United States for an event, in truth i believe that giving a concert to a foreign public leaves a mark of strength and aggressiveness. I don't know if it's a question of culture, but it could be that the japanese public is something of clam in the sense. Amy Lee:- Yes, the last time I was here I though that, this time I don't think they held back much. Could be that the japanese public is also changing. Mana sama:- Ah, I also think that. Even though because of my appearance I have more female fans, lately in Japan the male public is growing, and I have the impression of the energy in their concerts also increased. Amy Lee:- In our concerts in the United States, I believe that the proportion male-female is approximately the same. For the rock bands, it's normal for there to be more males. So, to be 50-50 seems good to me, it's a good percentage. Q:- The two of you appeared in the same European Gothic magazine, you must have some things in common. Amy Lee:- Yes, probably, in the musical sense, we are very similar. Q:-And related to the Gothic, it doesn't matter that is something dark, what's your impression on that? Amy Lee:- It's difficult explaining it in one word, but it pains me when people that before listening to our music, are stuck on our look or image. It's truth that the music of Evanecense contains a lot of Gothic elements, and receives a lot of influence from such. If you would have to describe us, I would say that the darkness of the early Victorian era, we have as much classical part as metal, like digital, and our musical style is composed of those elements. Mana sama:- It really is difficult to say it in one word. Since infancy I was influenced by movies of the occult and vampires, and also was drawn in part by movies such as "La profesía". Later my father was teacher for classical music, from since young I had the feel of music. Amy Lee:- That is really good. Mana sama:- For that I think we both have much in common. Perhaps because of the Gothic image that have within me, the things both beautiful and dark, i think it would be the combination with the beautiful, right? Amy Lee:- I completely agree. To join that contrast, and express the beauty of those things. Recently Mana sama was talking about the influenced he received from watching horror films, personally I love all of Tim Burton's work. Our drummer Rocky Gray and our guitarist John LeCombt also like horror films, and during the tour they spend watching the same things. In particular, the material from the 70's until 90's is where most of the influence lies. Mana sama:- I'm jealous. The other members of Moi dix Mois never mention anything about horror films. Q:-You recently mentioned that the "image came first", don't you think that it's a central point of Visual? Amy Lee:- Yes, it is a central point, but for an artist image isn't everything, the first is for the music to be understood. But in definit, it would be good to build both an image and the music together. Mana sama:- I also think the same way. With what I plan to join the beauty and darkness. In the music I want to show the same, in the same way. That is why I created my own brand of clothes "moi meme Moitie". And I apply in the "Elegant Gothic Lolita" the combination of Gothic and the tenderness of the lolitas. Q:- Amy, did you have interest in the Gothic/lolita style of Japan? Amy Lee:- Yes, I've always liked it very much. With this tour in Japan, I had the opportunity to be in Tokyo for a few days, and I think I that I ended up buying many things with the style. To be honest, the union on dark and cute not only interests me, but it's really lovely. that and I also like the spiders as well*. Mana sama:- Last year, I had the pleasure of being in the "Wave Gotik Treffen" of Germany, a huge event, ( the biggest Gothic festival that began in 1992) and I felt the Gothic was big in German culture. And compared to that, I think Japan has a growing interest. Amy Lee:- About the matter of Europe now a days, the truth in a cultural level and historic is that they are above the United States. And between those who attend our concerts, even though there are many of those who are influence by the image of the band, there are many who are in the mode of Gothic. Q:- And what was it that fascinate in the United States about the beautiful and dark? Amy Lee:- Of course there is not much for a Gothic culture in the United States. Telling you from the beginning, it could not come from there itself, originally it wasn't really about fallowing fashion, definitely not about fallowing only the Gothic, and in the thing I that I picked up, a time I listened to Body Subject, went to see Depeche Mode, and that sort of thing... I mentioned Tim Burton, what I like the most is " the Nightmare Before Christmas". I think my influence came from people from bands like Danny Elfman. Q:- For sure, you both lead your own bands, what is your ultimate objective? Amy Lee:- Definite... as music, i think it's important to stay in constant scold with one self. Making new albums, to have to keep daring with new thing. And about the objective of the band... to a certain degree, I believe we accomplished a lot. briefly, when we make music, we want to be heard and attract the attention of many, we want to be understood. It's something difficult, and it's our ultimate objective. Mana sama:- About Moi dix Mois, most of the composition come from japanese, and I don't know what the is commencement of japanese in the world, but I believe our objective is to go as far as possible with our mother tongue. Amy Lee:- That's impressive. I think the same, to reach other country with songs from our own language, and be understood is something exceptional interesting. Q:- And finally, even in Europe, do you think Evanecense and Moi dix Mois share the same scenery? Amy Lee:- That would be good. Mana sama:- Would be fun. What we were talking today, and everything we have in common, even the classic, we like the dark, we have a lot of things in common. That is why it would be good to do a concert together. Amy Lee:- Thank you, I was thinking the same. In all these days and all the interview I had, to have the opportunity to talk with an artist that share the same musical objective makes me happy. From my heart, thank you very much for this great time. Mana sama:-Here... I have a gift... (hands over a Moi meme Moitie product) Amy Lee:- *laughs* Thank you very much, it's so pretty! (She puts on the necklace she receives) Photos: Tsukogoshi kenji Interview: Tsuchiya Kyosuke translation: Tenshi D. 我很久沒聽EVANESCENCE 的歌了
不過我很開心聽到這個消息呢~~~
因為我一直是EVANESENCE 和M10M 的FANS!!!!!!
MANAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! AMY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
太興奮了 , 成個人HIGH HIGH 地....... 08 März 本月第一個blog...愈來愈久才update 一次blog了...
今天上不了forum=.=
很悶啊~~
EQ沒得玩 , 走去玩卡巴拉島
阿姐又管得勁嚴 , 哎~做她的妹真辛苦了...
有人SELL 幫人訂JUKA的SINGLE ,
我問一下個價錢 ,
它居然要我給150港幣!!!
比買gackt的CD更貴 (雖然兩者有DVD版)
可是上網沒得訂有DVD版的single啊~~~ 27 Februar 超级经典的56个口误1.有一次,我同学询问我另一个同学在医院是哪一科的,我记不太清楚了,觉得又像是内科又像是针灸科,结果就说她是:内疚科的。 2.一男生看到舅舅:“买舅啊,二菜!“ 舅舅:“这孩子,这么大话了,连人都不会说!“ 3.我上学时候的团支书特别不会说话,我入团的时候 只有我和另一个女生(属于惨不忍睹那种)我们的团支书主持的时候毫不犹豫就说:今天是两位同学大喜的日子,其余同学全体笑翻过了一个学期又是这位老兄主持另一位同学的入团仪式的时候说道 欢迎XXX同学加入我们这个神秘的组织中来…… 4.我有一特腼腆的男同学,去食堂打早饭,窗口里那伙计问他:“要点儿什么?“他低着头说:“我要。。。我要。。一个包子和一个包子。“那伙计盯了他半天,说:“你要什么呢?再说一遍?“ “我要一个包子和一个包子。。。。。。哦不!一个包子和一个面包!“ 伙计FAINT! 5.大学时候,一同学和我争论问题,一时处于下风,情急中一拍桌子起身大叫:你胡说,我又不是不傻! 6.我一哥们去相亲,回来大家问他怎么样,哥们讲: 这个女孩真糙。中午到了饭点,2个人进了一家牛肉拉面馆,女孩对师傅大声说道:嘿,给拉2碗~~~ 拉面的师傅说:你吃吗?吃我就拉。 我哥们赶紧说:1碗,您拉1碗就行了。据说,当时在饭馆的人都哈哈大笑~~ 7.有次我妹妹给我介绍一支曲子,她说叫“少女的衬裤”,我心下诧异,拿过CD来一看,是“少女的祈祷”…… 8.小学老师在公开课之前“抚慰”我们紧张的心情,说道:“大家不用紧张,到了课堂不要东张西望,台下坐的还不都是人,不都是长着两个鼻子,一个眼睛嘛!” 9.上英语课,老师:“good morning ,teacher“ 学生:“good morning ,student“ 全班皆倒。。。。 ^_^ 10.小时候冰棍雪糕的一般都是推着自行车叫卖,有一次,在屋子里听一阿姨喊:新来的雪糕,热乎的。(估计阿姨以前是卖油饼油条的) 11.我一个同学给另一个朋友打电话,对方的爷爷接的,那同学不知道在想什么,张嘴就是:“爷爷,我是奶奶。。。”突然觉得不对,哐一下就把电话挂了…… 12.我和妹妹小时候在家玩,她假装一个侠女,很警觉地竖着耳朵听听外面,然后一脸警惕地跟我说:“哎?不对大头阿!” 13.单位同事看报纸,说,刘晓庆没结婚就生了个孩子,叫云云,我们赶忙拿着报纸找,不见。她走过来给我们指,一看,是“刘晓庆在那个年代,就曾说过很现代的言论,诸如一辈子单身,但不结婚也可以生个孩子云云。” 14.一小学生第一次参加学校的朗诵比赛,特别紧张,老师鼓励了老半天,手心还是冒汗。终于轮到她了。 小学生一咬牙,几步走到了台中央:"老师们,同学们,我朗诵的题目是:红叶疯(枫)了......(枫叶红了) 15.小学生,看到被老师点到念作文的同学,特别羡慕,总盼着老师也能让自己念一回。机会终于来了。 "某某,把你的作文给大家念一下! 小学生"腾"地一下站起来:"《我的老师》。老师,我多象你的妈妈......" 16.这回是一个歌舞团的学艺不精的主持人。 一次演出,之前没好好准备就匆忙登台了。 演出依次进行。 轮到她报幕了:"观众朋友们,下面请听犊(独)子笛奏......" 17.我家里在冬天经常把大葱栽在盆子里,以保持它的鲜嫩。 我妹妹过年回家看到了,欣喜地对我妈说:"哎!妈,这粗真葱......" 我和我妈皆笑倒。 18.有个我叫"大姑"的邻居,每天骑自行车上班。 一早,在门口碰到她,我微笑着客气了一句:"上姑啊,大班......" 呸!......我当时恨不得把自己的舌头咬下来。 19.某女同学,一天顾影自怜,忽转头对后面的人说:"我的胸毛美不美?" 吓人一跳,又说:"噢,我是想问我的眉毛凶不凶。" 20.还是小学生的时候,在全校大会上表决心:"我们要学习红军过雪山爬草地的革命精神. ” 从此以后终身被剥夺政治发言权利! 21.我爸就给我讲语文书上有写刘胡兰的课文,当刘胡兰主动向日本鬼子承认她是***来挽救全村人生命的时候,一个老大爷出面救她,台词是:"小香子,你疯啦?!"可是在 *** 的年代,一个可怜的农村孩子大声朗读:"小疯子,你香了?” 22.高中的时候老师让我的同桌朗读课文,此女历来以朗读生动见称,那天也是同样抱着课本抑扬顿挫的朗读: ......他坚守着暴风雪中的哨岗,手中紧紧握着一支钢枪......(原文) 我们听到的是..... ......他坚守着暴风雪中的哨岗,手中紧紧握着一支钢笔...... ....全班一阵沉默,老师笑倒,之后同学倒.... 23.全体起立!奏国旗,升国歌... 24.我带儿子去喂鸭子。他一边给鸭子撒面包屑一边追鸭子到处跑,我拿着他的苹果在后面追他(他不爱吃,我只能在他精神分散的时候伺机塞给他几口)。他不停地跑,我不停地喊他:"过来吃一口苹果再追鸭子!"总是重复这一句,我终于大声喊出了口:"过来吃一口鸭子......"然后很聪明地刹住了闸。 25.记得上小学的时候,有片课文叫瀑布的,中间说到作者转过一座山见到一条瀑布垂在山间,我的一个女同学朗读的时候也是声情并茂的念:转过这座山,我惊呆了,一条破布挂在山上。。。 全班同学都惊呆了。 26.还有一个从俄罗斯作家的小说摘来的课文里有一句是:这里的房子都是老爷(指有钱人)们的。 结果我的一个男同学朗读道:这里的房子都是老爷们儿的。话音一落,我们语文老师就疑惑地问他:那老娘们儿都住哪儿? 27.最经典的是我有一次看窦文涛讲自己刚当主持时的糗事,切不说开幕抱成谢幕.....最让我喷饭的是他说 有一次主持一台晚会时,从容的上去,深情的说:“朋友们,您见过黄河吗?您知道它是我们的母亲河吗~~”在一番深情的介绍黄河后,他说道:“下面请听《长江之歌》” 28.以前我做收银员时,有一次一个人女人拿了包卫生巾来买单,结帐后我本来想说> “ 请慢走 ” ,结果一不小心说成了“ 请慢用 ” …… 29.高中时,一同学在聊天中谈到中东局势,忽然冒了一句:约旦侯(猴)王国赛因。顿时笑翻…… 30.有收鸭毛得,在街上叫‘收鸭毛咧” 一次和熟人聊天。说到熟人感冒了,后大声吼了一句“收感冒咧 31.我上学时候的团支书特别不会说话,我入团的时候只有我和另一个女生(属于惨不忍睹那种)我们的团支书主持的时候毫不犹豫就说:今天是两位同学大喜的日子,其余同学全体笑翻-_-0 32.记得我和同事一起去郊游.同事结了婚的,然后我们做烧烤吃.同事很嗲的对她老公喊到:老公,你来剥这根葱嘛~~~~不知道是太兴奋了还是怎么的...结果说成了:老葱~~你来剥这根公嘛~~~~ 33.我记得在我上初中时,有一课是关于北大荒的,老师让我们念课文,有一句是“杠大狍子瓢舀鱼,野鸡飞到饭锅里”可是在大家一起朗读时,我清楚的听见我同桌不小心口误,念成了 “ 杠大狍子瓢舀鱼,野鸡飞到被窝里 ”我当时快笑晕了,可她居然还没意识到,一本正经的问我怎么了? 34.记得有一次和同事们在办公室里说某某某像农民,土土的,憨憨的,很可爱,大家都说是的是的,像农民像农民,突然电话响了,接电话的同事居然说,喂,你好,农民!~ 35.我有一特腼腆的男同学,去食堂打早饭,窗口里那伙计问他:要点儿什么? 他低着头说:我要...我要..一个包子和一个包子.那伙计盯了他半天,说:你要什么呢?再说一遍? 我要一个包子和一个包子......哦不!一个包子和一个面包!伙计FAINT! 36.某日在宿舍看《穆斯林的葬礼》,同学问“看什么书这么入迷?”说着抢了过去,读:《斯大林的葬礼》,我顿时笑翻。还没等我笑完他又说“嘿,嘿,作者是雷达 (霍达)哎,其时我们正好在学雷达避碰课,笑的我肚子都疼了。 37.我最怕我的大舅了。有一天在集上看见了他,我一害怕,脱口而出: “集!你也来赶舅了?” 38.有一次上语文课,老师叫班上的一位PLMM起来读第一段课文,MM起来想都没 想就读到:新华社长(zhang) 江前线报道.(注:原文为:新华社长江(chang jiang)前线报道)全班哄堂大笑…… 39.我六岁那年我妹四岁,有一次路过宾馆门口看见一头驴在大街上走,旁边也没有农民,估计是走丢了吧,立刻兴奋的转头给我妈我爸说,快看快看,驴一个人走着呢呵呵呵呵…… 40.我初中一同学上历史课溜号,老师叫其读课文,慌忙中拿起书本读到:“法国舰队司,令狐拔……”全班笑翻! 41.当年高中军训时,偶寝室一MM刚洗澡回来~用手指着头,无比自豪的说:“你们看看,我的‘ 裤 ’ 头酷不酷? ”众人狂晕~~~~~~ 42.小学学历史,记不清哪个阶段了,分为:母系氏族和父系氏族,偏偏老师把偶抽起来提问,一激动,答:母系氏族和公系氏族。老师第一个笑起来,跟着全班哄堂大笑。 43.曾经形容某人,本想说:“ 那厮脑满肠肥! ” 结果说成:“ 那厮满脑肥肠!” 听者一愣,后暴笑,得出结论: “对他脑袋里都是肥肠! ” 44.我小时候写作文的时候写着:我们的生活是解放军叔叔用鲜血换来的。结果我起来朗诵的时候我读成了“我们的生活是解放军叔叔用鲜鱼换来的…… 45.有一个学生把课文中“ 王二小把敌人带进了八路军的埋伏圈” 读成 “王二小把八路军带进了敌人的埋伏圈”…… 46.一天和我同学在酒吧看电视,看到一个非常可笑的画面.她可能想说真搞笑,又想说真好玩,结果很大声的说了一句: 哈哈,真搞玩! 47.还有一次,一本正经的给一个同学讲大道理: “我告诉你啊,天下没有午餐的免费!“看他马上就要笑出来了,急忙改口:“ 哦,天下没有午费的免餐!“对方暴笑,从此轻易不给别人讲道理. 48.我妈妈有颈椎病,天天往脖子上抹药,有天我问她:“ 你药(要)抹脖子了吗?”妈妈瞪着眼睛看着不解的我说:“我还没有打算自杀!” 49.我的耳朵有只生下来就缺一角,我问我妈妈怎么搞的,妈妈开玩笑说:“ 你爸咬的!”我爸爸在饭厅吃饼,接了句:“我没有咬,我是撕着吃的!!”巨寒!! 50.记得上学时,开运动会,我们班的女生没有人报名,我们的体育委员(男生)很是着急,拿着报名表在全班宣布:告诉你们,女生听清楚了,再不报名,就“强报”(强制报名)。女生愤怒。 51.有次我妈同学来我家吃饭,吃完了一碗我妈要给她再盛。她说,你别给我盛了,我不够。。。 52.有一次,偶给偶同学打电话,对方拿起电话喂了一声,我突然忘记自己是给谁打的电话了,恩了半天冒了一句:你是谁? 53.一次同学和我借钱坐公车回家,应该说:“借钱我坐公车回家”,却把话说成:“借公车我回家坐钱”,。。。。。 54.有一次,我和朋友去吃饭,吃到一半朋友说:“小姐,给来包卫生巾(餐巾纸)!”小姐幽默的说:“要不要带护翼的?”当场晕倒! 55.我有一高中同学给我打电话,拨错号了拨到男生宿舍了,那边一男的说:喂你找谁.我这位同学一楞,居然问:请问这是女生宿舍吗. 56.还有一个搞笑的,那天我们寝卧聊,聊到了唐伯虎点秋香(周星星演得)正好说道太师的儿子“阁下莫非是低能儿?”有一同学估计是刚醒,接了一句“我靠,这都被你看出来了!!”全寝当场笑翻!! |
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